You Are Not Entitled to Anything

And that's precisely where your freedom begins.

I want you to contemplate upon just one simple thing: Everything you have ever had, everything you have ever experienced, everything you call your own has been given to you. Yes literally everything, your body, your mind, your thoughts, your emotions, your family, your intelligence, your beauty, your talents, the language you speak, the country you were born in and even the beliefs you hold so dearly today. Just contemplate upon this for a moment. Did you choose your body? Did you choose the family you were born into? Did you consciously decide which thought would arise in your mind five seconds from now? No my friend, all of it has been given to you. You have been receiving since the very moment you came into this existence and yet somehow we have convinced ourselves that we are entitled to everything we desire, everything we love and everything we have worked for.

Now isn't that fascinating? We arrive on this earth empty-handed, receive everything from existence and then spend our entire lives claiming ownership over things which were never permanently ours to begin with. This is MY body, MY intelligence, MY knowledge, MY money, MY achievements, MY relationships, MY identity. Just look at how beautifully the ego constructs itself. Something that was given to us becomes something we identify as ourselves and then we spend our entire lives defending it, protecting it, comparing it with others and becoming miserable whenever something threatens to take it away. But tell me one thing, if everything has been given to you, what exactly are you entitled to hold on to?

Take a simple example of love. You meet someone, you fall deeply in love with them, you spend beautiful moments together, you create memories and for some time their very presence makes this existence feel like heaven. But then one day they decide to leave. And suddenly the same love which once brought you so much happiness becomes the source of your suffering. Why? Because somewhere along the way you started believing that the other person belonged to you, that because you loved them they must love you back, that because you gave them your time they owe you theirs. But my friend, weren't they always free just like you? Didn't you fall in love with them precisely because of who they were? Then why should your love become a prison for their freedom? You can love someone with your whole existence, you can express your desires, you can try everything in your power to make the relationship work but ultimately the other person is free to make their own choices. And so are you.

This is precisely where my philosophy of Swatantrya, Total Freedom, comes in. Everyone is unique, everyone is an individual and everyone is free. If we truly comprehend this from the core of our heart then how can we ever feel entitled to another person's love, attention, respect or approval? We can ask for these things, we can cultivate relationships where they are present and we can walk away when we are being mistreated, but we cannot demand that another free individual fulfil our every expectation. Love them for who they are, not for who you want them to become. And if heartbreak comes, experience that too. Heartbreak is one of the most beautiful emotions because it tells you that yes, you have a heart and you were able to get outside of yourself and love another person. You don't have to glorify the suffering or remain in a relationship that harms you, but you can appreciate that you experienced something so beautiful in the first place.

Now take another example, success. We work day and night towards our dreams, we sacrifice our comforts, we spend years learning, building, creating and then one day everything falls apart. And suddenly we start questioning existence itself. Why did this happen to me? I worked so hard, I deserved to succeed, why did someone else achieve what I couldn't? But who told you that life owes you success just because you worked hard? Your efforts are yours to make, but the outcome depends upon countless things beyond your control. You can give your entire existence to something and still fail. Does that make your effort meaningless? Nah my friend, why should it? You experienced the joy of creation, you learnt things you never knew before, you discovered your strengths and limitations and perhaps your work will help someone else accomplish what you couldn't. Isn't that beautiful? You are free to give everything to your dreams, but your dreams are not obliged to unfold according to your expectations.

And don't misunderstand me, I am not advocating passiveness. Quite the opposite! I have always advocated for activeness, for following your heart with full force, for chasing your dreams with delusional optimism and experiencing life in its totality. Earn money, build extraordinary things, fall in love, travel the world, create art, experiment, make mistakes, learn and keep going. But don't let your happiness become dependent upon getting everything you desire. There's a beautiful distinction between wanting something and believing that existence owes it to you. The first makes you active, creative and alive whereas the second can make you miserable whenever things don't happen according to your expectations.

This is what I find so beautiful about vairagya or detachment. People often confuse detachment with not caring, but it's not that. Detachment in its true sense is being fully involved in whatever you are experiencing without making your identity dependent upon it. Think of a child playing with his toys. He builds something, destroys it, creates something new and gets lost in the whole experience. He isn't constantly thinking about what he will gain or lose from it, he is simply enjoying the act of playing. Now imagine approaching life like this. You build a business, you love someone, you learn something, you experience success or failure, but throughout all of it you remain aware that these are experiences passing through your existence. You don't have to hold on to every experience forever to make it meaningful.

And this brings me to something even more profound. Samaj hi moksha hai. Understanding itself is liberation. If everything we have ever received has been given to us, then what exactly are we? What remains when we remove everything we have acquired, everything we identify ourselves with, everything we are afraid of losing? Our body changes, our thoughts change, our emotions change, our relationships change and even our understanding of ourselves keeps changing. So why are we holding on to any of these things as though they were our permanent identity? This is precisely what fascinates me about the method of neti neti, not this, not this. Keep investigating everything you believe yourself to be until you begin recognising that none of these changing things can completely define your existence.

And when I say you are not entitled to anything, I don't mean that people should tolerate injustice or that children don't deserve love, care and protection. Every individual deserves dignity and freedom, and we have a responsibility to protect one another from harm. What I am questioning is this psychological belief that the universe must always give us what we desire, that the people around us must behave according to our expectations and that the things we receive must remain with us forever. We can stand against injustice with full strength without believing that life will always unfold according to our wishes.

Now imagine a person who has truly comprehended this. What does he have to be arrogant about when everything he possesses has been received through existence? Why should he feel superior because of his intelligence, beauty, wealth, caste, nationality or achievements? And why should he feel inferior when someone else possesses things he doesn't? He can appreciate his own gifts, appreciate the gifts of others and use whatever he has received to create something beautiful. From this understanding humility, gratitude, equanimity and love can begin flowering naturally. You don't have to constantly remind yourself to be humble or detached, because you understand that everything is changing and that nothing temporary can become the entirety of who you are.

Perhaps this is why life becomes so beautiful when we stop trying to possess it. Every morning you wake up is another opportunity to experience this magnificent existence. Every person you meet, every idea that arises, every beautiful moment you experience is something that need not have happened exactly as it did. Even tomorrow isn't guaranteed to us. So why spend this precious time constantly complaining about everything we haven't received when there is so much to experience right here, right now?

I have always felt that the greatest blessing of life is experience itself, no matter what it is. We are constantly receiving from existence and through our actions contributing something back to it. Become aware of this beautiful relationship. Receive whatever life presents before you, work upon it, create from it, learn from it and when its time has passed, let it go. Don't spend your entire existence holding on to yesterday when today is already presenting you with something new.

You are not entitled to anything, my friend, and perhaps that is one of the most liberating things you can ever understand. Because once you stop believing that existence owes you everything, you begin appreciating everything it has already given you. You stop making demands upon every passing moment and start experiencing life with the freshness of a child again.

And from this understanding arises something I find extraordinarily beautiful: gratitude without helplessness, ambition without attachment, love without possession and freedom without arrogance.

You have been given this beautiful opportunity to experience life, so why not live it fully? Chase your dreams, love everyone, create extraordinary things, help others discover their freedom and when the time comes to leave something behind, let it go with the same love with which you received it.

After all, everything was a gift, nothing was a permanent possession, and the freedom to experience it was the greatest gift of all.

Swatantrya, my friend. Total Freedom. ❤️✍🏻